1. last night, at the meeting, we talked about how much money we have in the women & performance account. tina was like “we should gamble it.” i don’t even think she reads my tumblr.
    later, barbara suggested a book of poetry to me, then turned to aliza and said “i think it opens with an epigraph from you.” i was pleased that the quote—“for as both good poets and feminists know, sometimes we must willfully and wrongly create our fathers before we try to kill them”—has already appeared on my tumblr, and that it was first written for barbara, who has asked me to consider thinking more about feminist metabolization.

    even later, most of us reconvened at apple. someone said they had to hang out with a bunch of their boyfriend’s ex-girlfriends all weekend. i was like “no you don’t” and “tell him he can’t be friends with them.” someone else said “yeah, you’re not a lesbian in olympia. this is new york.”

    alex has never supported this particular zealotry, but he did once say that we are “all like a theoretical disagreement away from mass murder.” tina wanted to know if i would keep coming to w&p meetings even though i’m no longer managing editor. i said yes, w&p is why i wanted to be in the program, and plus, i have more power now being on the outside. especially since i was on the inside first.

     

  2. i told barbara about my new living situation and she smiled and said “a room of one’s own.” that’s my reference point, too, and i like the other thing that virginia woolf said about rooms, which is that she never knew what her husband was going to say when he walked into one. carolyn heilbrun called this “a remarkable definition of a good marriage,” which i told marc the last night we were in puerto rico, and he agreed. to christen the apartment, i’m spending today re-reading shoshana felman’s the scandal of the speaking body. it’s been a long time since i posted the quote “to seduce is to produce felicitous language." barbara asked if marc ever asks me not to write about things, or if it bothers him for me to write about things, and i said no, i think he likes it. 

     
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  4. also, why do men write about the internet? is it weird if i write a dissertation without ever citing a man on the internet? 

    (Source: malarky-shenanigans, via dudguacamole)

     
  5. judy chicago, atmospheres,  performance pieces involving smoke and various pyrotechnical materials, various locations in california, 1967

     

  6. "I began to get enormously interested in how everybody said the same thing over and over again with infinite variations but over and over again until finally if you listened with great intensity you could hear it rise and fall and tell all that there was inside them, not so much by the actual words they said or the thoughts they had but the movement of their thoughts and words endlessly the same and endlessly different."
    — Gertrude Stein (via thisblankpage). yes, it’s like this. (evocation is more important than information.) 

    (Source: enchntdrosewrites, via notational)

     

  7. "For tenderness between people is nothing other than awareness of the possibility of relations without purpose, a solace still glimpsed by those embroiled in purposes; a legacy of old privileges promising a privilege-free condition."
    — Theodor W. Adorno, Minima Moralia (via fictionalhorse)

    (via aviatrixie)

     
  8. one of marc’s colleagues, upon hearing about our various vacation plans, said “i thought you said she was a feminist.” he was like “she’s not that kind of feminist.” vacationing is at least proximate to babbling and daydreaming, and so far contains both. 

     
  9. babbling is next to daydreaming

     
  10. in the 10 days between valentine’s day and this weekend’s trip i have gotten two manicures, one pedicure, one keratin treatment, a haircut, a bikini wax, and a lash tint. i also bought a four-piece lingerie set that i described to two friends as “tawny kitaen in a whitesnake video,” but not (yet) a new bikini.