july 2012. just like now. 

"Grandiosity is of course a term itself rich with theoretical inflection, much of it derived from psychoanalysis keyed to object-relations, where it is largely a term of disapprobation. Grandiosity marks the infant’s delusional sense that the world is, and should be, co-terminus with its wishes: marks, that is, a position that in the more normative registers of “development” must be abandoned. We, on the other hand, are lovers of Whitman—and are also, in our loves, people who have passionately, stubbornly resisted the notion that we cannot, with the force of our desire, remake the world as we wish it to be. So we incline to think grandiosity more kindly. It names for us a quality of abundance, of an achieved amplitude on the scene of self-relation, that is willing to risk a lot on behalf of the revised constellation of possibilities such an orientation can bring into relief. Grandiosity is a willingness to risk, first, not being critical, at least not in the modes we’ve come to know. It marks a detachment from irony or camp, as well as the various exteriorities of “critique,” as modes understood to be exhaustive or exclusive. And it names too, in ways the Kleinians would be quick to recognize, an openness to the kinds of wounding that might follow from grandiosity’s perhaps inevitable disappointments—or, we might say, from its collisions with intractability in its many guises."

From Peter Coviello and Elizabeth Freeman’s ”Never the Usual Terms: A Song for 21st Century Occupations,” in the latest issue of Periscope. (via lazz)

marc said that this was his best vacation ever and i agreed. highlights include a bunch of conceptual jokes that got really elaborate; staying an extra day; talking about how i quit my post-collegiate starbucks job mid-training, and marc saying “it’s our quitter aesthetic”; and when, at the casino, erin said “marc, you really need better ways to spend your money” and i said “aren’t you glad you met me?” 

militant:

Miriam Elia (2011)

I love it

“art against art” is a winning tag 

i’m writing my dissertation for real

this is the beginning of my second  book and i have real feelings about it. this is exciting.  i really loved writing a book the first time. 

today in diss prop aliza asked if we could embrace narcissism in our dissertation. she argued that we are all writing about ourselves anyway, that narcissism is important to feminist and queer theory, and after enthusiastically and specifically supporting the dissertation objective i’d written added, “kara is interested in viral feminism because she does it.” i was sitting next to her, so it was easy to look at her lovingly and giggle.  

later, our professor was like, “people in performance studies are familiar with the first person,” and i giggled again. 

home forever, though we’re on a timeline now, we have agreed to be done in two years, we are all too fucking lazy for fellowship applications. 

later, at our favorite terrible nyu bar, aliza said: “sex should only be discussed if it’s about you” and “we don’t need to talk about sex because it’s what we are doing all the time.” i said:  “their clothes aren’t jokes.” the waiter said:  “oh, you’re splitting” and one of us said “no, one of each.” 

this weekend in gender roles

• agreed that facebook friending is the man’s job in the relationship 
• ordered my own meal and then said “you’ve never heard me do that before have you?”
• said i didn’t like “bridesmaids” that much because i only care about bromances ie. the upcoming “entourage” movie
• was told that i had to choose between playing the honors student or the bitch should i ever get a 60-second cameo in an 80s movie and replied that i could probably be both because my career has been dedicated to exploring the ways in which the 90s brought these tropes together (also that i really only care about achieving this impossible life goal for the big, blonde hair and tube dress)  
• “i love spontaneous hangouts but also i wish i just knew sometimes because then i can plan outfits” “that makes so much sense to me. my whole life is planning outfits. (i am weirdly psyched about wearing something so demure today.)” 
• said “i’m sorry we fought” 
• said “i don’t know, i’ve really never been to any weddings” 
• remembered that time i was listing things i am bad at; laura said “so you’re bad at being a woman” and i said that i can do the fashion. i was reminded of this at rosh hashanah tonight because no matter how feminine i present i am so terrible at being a woman, i can never figure out the right time at a party to clear a table or fill a dishwasher, i’m just two thrown out plates and an equal number of verbal attempts. and then i can never figure out if, honestly, i just don’t fucking care to know or do it or if it’s a durational one-woman protest or if i am genuinely confused or if i am thinking about other things. like, am i ADD (diagnosed) or am i just a jerk or what? i will accept any answer, but i do kind of want to know. 

tonight aliza put me in a cab that probably definitely someone else was waiting for and we said

(kj:) that’s why you’re my friend

(as:) you’re prettier 

at the exact same time 

fuckdudeskilldudes:

Academic tumblrers: let’s do this

ameliaabreu:

It may be a horrible idea, but Lana goaded me into starting a HASTAC group where we can talk about “famous anorexics”, feminism, archives, weird material cultures, ET CETERA. Join! You can put it on your CV! You can say that you do “digital humanities” and then post some pictures of stuffed animals.

pendleton blankets?

omg it’s called “better things to do.” i’m so in and adding a picture.

my flirting is more in the body of my tumblr, but i appreciate this strategy.