1. last summer, a friend emailed to ask if i wanted to work on a short-term project at her fashion magazine, and i burst into tears. this year, a friend emailed to ask if i wanted to work on a short-term project at her fashion magazine and i was like, oh my god, i am going to get paid a really high day rate to learn new beauty tips (you can use an eyelash curler even after applying mascara), distract myself from premarital stress, and figure out who should do the hair and makeup for my wedding. 

    i had a vision: i wanted a hair stylist and makeup artist who worked backstage and did editorial, but would consent to doing bridal as long as it didn’t look like bridal. i didn’t think these people actually existed, so i was prepared to research until i found a suitable, disappointing alternative.

    i spent a month working on glamour dos and dont’s, a project so steeped in historical import and feelings i was often on the verge of weeping. in doing so, i found out—for once, this never happens—that my vision could actually be realized. the kind of people i wanted to make me look like a milder version of a vogue italia model did, in fact, exist, as a group. i even knew some of their work from before (like, from w magazine editorials i had saved in my tumblr drafts).

    i had forgotten how hard it is to create images with professionals. everyone has a vision, and an ego, and if you are anna wintour you can do a several thousand dollar beauty shoot and if doesn’t work it doesn’t matter: you kill it. if i could be as wasteful as the old conde nast i might be. i mean: i definitely would be. that was part of what made the old conde nast great. 

    we’re working it out. i had my hair cut yesterday and we started considering which extensions are the right extensions. i would be lying if i said i had complete faith that i’m going to look a way i want to look when i walk out the door for the ceremony. but my stylist said she loved the gemma ward updo i sent her as a reference, and i like the gamble.  

     
  2. also this was me just getting started.

     
  3. even if i did not have eight stray eyebrow hairs that i considered for several hours (nonconsecutively) for days, i would have still gone to see jimena before the wedding. it’s only right. we didn’t have much time, since i booked last minute, though she didn’t rush me. she asked if i was nervous and i said yes, about running out of samples of la mer last week, and various intricate family dramas, but not about marriage or marc. i told her about my brother and she said, immediately, “you can’t think about that right now and some people won’t understand.” i said i knew, and agreed, and suspected they didn’t. she looked at my brows and saw exactly what i saw; “you just had to,” she said, adding that one of my former assistants had been to see her yesterday and that they had spent twenty minutes discussing whether the shoulder on celia’s new blazer had been properly tailored. we also said “i love you,” over and over, and she refused to let me pay or even tip. 

     
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  5. lelaid:

    Jerry Hall by Antonio Lopez

    this is actually exactly the perfect look for saturday night drinks and dinner with our families, although i am not jerry hall, this is not that decade, and if i wore real fur someone would throw paint on me (actually, where we are going, no one would throw paint on me). the reference i actually the sent the makeup artist was a more subdued, more 2014, more beauty blog (not that i don’t like beauty blogs) version of this. alas. i still expect my hair will be up and my eye shadow will be more straight-up (but perhaps still bronze-y?) smoky eye and the orange lips should be orangier, not redder. but i’m definitely showing this perfect image to the beauty team. it’s my job to come up with references; it’s their job to make my ideas realistic. kind of realistic. i just want them to keep a little bit of the crazy in the pretty.  

     

    1. m: i told you, you're an artist.
    2. you're exploring the intersection of makeup, fashion, feminism, and manipulation.
    3. kj: what's the manipulation?
    4. m: getting me to buy you expensive clothes.
     
  6. wmagazine:

    California Dreamy

    Photograph by Claiborne Swanson Frank. 

    i’m a little taken by the wallpaper, which won’t be there, and by those stunning blue earrings, though i no longer have my ears pierced. the eye makeup is beautiful, though i was thinking more dramatic. but this is the right coral lip color for saturday, and maybe the updo is a little much for real life, but it’s softened by that tendril. she’s doing off the shoulder, too, which makes me feel calm. recommended. 

     
  7. labsinthe:

    "The Girly Show" Mariacarla Boscono photographed by Mert & Marcus for W 2012

    w remains my favorite american fashion magazine. it’s edited by my former boss—gracious, stylish, italian—and this is one of my favorite shoots of the last several years. i’m obviously not doing this hair, i can barely see this makeup, but i fully support this fashion and this life. these slingbacks are in the top five white heels i have ever loved. these slingbacks, with that lingerie, could easily change your life. 

     

  8. Gemma Ward wears Chanel, photographed by Tim Walker for Vogue, February 2006

    (Source: rebelheartscouture, via its-a-fab-world)

    also i was so exhausted today, possibly because i knew it was the day to consider updos, which are almost universally boring—they look pretty because they are on a pretty model—but what’s the point if i could just throw it up myself? that’s for at the pool on the honeymoon. this, however, is next level. if you’re going to do it, do it. also, if i were going to get a real wedding dress, in white, i would have gotten chanel.

     
  9. its-a-fab-world:

    'The Pure Wonder' Anja Rubik for Vogue Italia October 2005

    what i mean is that i want to look like i am in a vogue italia shoot. or maybe i want to feel like i’m in a vogue italia shoot. that would be more practical. whatever, i think my married life should incorporate both.